There’s no collective noun for getting three PBs in a six week period. I’ve checked and it doesn’t exist. If I were a footballer I might say things like “I’m going to score a hat trick this weekend” which you’d rightly interpret as meaning “I’m going to score three goals in one match” or the more commonly correct “I’m going to sleep with three women none of whom are my wife”.

But I’m not a footballer: I’m a runner and this autumn I’m attempting to run three new PB’s over three different distances all in a six-week period. However, having to explain that has taken up valuable time I could have been using for speed drills or playing GrimJoggers on my iphone (FYI fun game – like Lemmings but with joggers).

I need a short word that explains this all in one short bust of breath or typing. Imagine if the collective noun for a group of lions didn’t exist. Instead of shouting “watch out for that pride” you’d have to scream “look out for the group of lions that live together some of whom may be related via the dominant male” by which stage whoever you were trying to warn would likely be the pride’s breakfast.

The next time I’m running alongside someone and they ask me “Are you training for anything?” I could be dangerously out of breath by the time I explain my intended goal. So to this end, and for the benefit of others out there who may also be attempting this same feat, I’ve taken it upon myself to establish a new word for this stuff. Soon runners all over the land will be chatting like this:

“Are you training for anything at the moment?”
“Yes, I’m hoping to bag myself an awesome this winter.”
“Wow. Three PBs over varying distances all in six weeks. Good luck with that. Sounds…. welll.. awesome.”
“Yeah. That’s probably why they called it that.”

So with a marathon PB already in the bag, I just need to run a half marathon under 1.56 and a 10k under 51 minutes and I’ve got myself the world’s first awesome.