As I was away doing a iron distance relay last Sunday, I dispatched guest blogger Phil to run the Vitality British 10k and write a report.

There’s been quite a few times when I have wanted to drop out of a race, but not usually after one mile. As I turned the corner towards Nelson’s Column I thought ‘I’m not sure even he would be up for this fight’.

I was running on the pavement at this point, because dodging the spectators was far easier than jogging in the race field. It was like the lycra zombie apocalypse had begun. A shuffling, groaning mass, although probably going a bit slower than your average member of the undead.

It had all started near Green Park tube where I began queuing for the start time of 9.35am. I knew this was a mass participation event, the ‘official British 10k’ in the heart of London with closed roads was always going to be. But I was not quite prepared for the amount of people that were there. It was like One Direction were launching a new iPhone.

It took me about 35 minutes to get down to Hyde Park corner and round to the right for the start. Then we were off – although we actually weren’t. The press of people meant that it was impossible to get above the zombie shuffle for at least 200 metres and then began 10k of crazy zig zagging round people like a sporty Supermarket Sweep. Without the distraction of Dale Winton in shorts.

I jumped back into the race pit just after the mile and tried to accept it, thinking of a tranquil beach scene as I do when I’m crushed on the tube. I managed a quick chat and a laugh about the stampede with a guy wearing a Dublin Marathon top. “Least there aren’t the hills here!” he said. Well, no, but there is a little kicker of a climb coming up from Trafalgar Square towards Cambridge Circus that caused some general cursing.

I adopted the plan of following a runner roughly at my pace and squeezing through the brief ‘hole’ they were making in the crowd. But it was so chaotic they would disappear or I would pass them after about half a mile, so a new scout had to be found.

This is firmly a race run for charity and friends were running three abreast all with headphones blasting in hula skirts – and why not. I bore them no malice, but it was impossible to get into any rhythm with such moving road blocks in a field of so many people.

I eventually settled behind a tall couple who were making good headway and then pushed on with what I had in my legs down past Downing Street to the finish.

There were no medals at the end, they could be collected near the bag drop, but guess what? There was a huge queue for them. I went home without the silverware, but with the quiet satisfaction of surviving the zombie invasion.

Conclusion

If you don’t live in London and want to take in the major sights of the city on a weekend away, this could be a fun event if you resign yourself to the queues and the crush (a true London experience!). Likewise if you are an inexperienced runner trotting out for a charity, there is plenty of support and a party atmosphere to enjoy. Regular runners who don’t regard a slow 10k as particularly challenge would be better looking at cheaper, faster alternatives such as the Regent’s Park 10k.

Phil’s place in this race was provided free of charge by the organisers.