When plans were announced years ago for a cycle superhighway through London, first I did an excited little yelp and then I imagined an express lane for bikes through the skies of the capital. It seemed so far in the future that these plans would actually materialise that I wondered whether we’d all be pedalling hoverbikes through the sky by then anyway and the cycle to work would resemble something out of ‘The Jetsons’.
The Cycle Superhighways have been open for about a year now and today I wheeled my trusty steed out of the garage once more to negotiate the velo express to work. 9.5 miles from South Wimbledon to Blackfriars Bridge on two wheels (unfortunately no hovering as yet – damn you Tomorrow’s World).
Back in the old days when I cycled the Uxbridge Road from Ealing to Oxford Circus and had to negotiate the massive roundabout at White City (these were the days before Westfield) all we had was a bit of green paint to keep us cyclists safe from certain death. Green paint! Bah! What use is that? People would park on it, pedestrians would stand on it, vans would pull over in it. Green pain was rubbish.
Now, in 2011 we have digital technology at our fingertips. Everything is bigger and smaller than ever before. You can read a book on a postage stamp and then book a holiday on your wristwatch. And, yeah, we also have BLUE PAINT! Take that motorists!
It may just be a bit of blue paint and look more ‘Wizard of Oz’ than ‘Back to the Future’, but it works pretty well. I suspect that this is because there is actually, embedded in the blue paint, a forcefield so strong it can repel a juggernaught. Either this or its been so long since most Londoners last saw trees and grass that they’ve lost the ability to see the colour green. Swap it to blue and hey presto – safer cycling for everything. Or maybe it’s because I’m a South Londoner. Answers on a postcard.
Juneathon Day 3
9.5 miles of super cycling into work
Welcome back, Super Cyclist. Are you feeling better now?
Haha!! Clearly the forcefield can only been seen or felt by things bigger than a cyclist…I have seen it working so I know this!
Yes, much better now thanks K.